Total Dance 2008 (Continuous Mix)

You know the drill: it's a mass-marketed compilation of dance "hits" — generally dance remixes of pop hits — which inevitably features on its cover a nubile young female in a bikini top and sunglasses. (Must be a scenester thing.) If you think you know the drill about its contents as well, you're likely right, though this one throws a slight curveball by sticking three of 2006-2007's biggest ringtone rap hits smack dab in its middle ("It's Goin' Down," "A Bay Bay," and "This Is Why I'm Hot"). As these are three of the emptiest rap records of the decade, they do everything to halt the comp's momentum. That's a shame, because there are a few good records here, mixed decently by former MTV presence DJ Skribble. Alan Braxe and Fred Falke have been, for connoisseurs of sexy French house, kings for much of the 2000s, and their killer strike rate continues with their mix of Kelis' "Bossy," a throbbing mass of heavy-duty new wavey synth action that perfectly complements Kelis' vocals (and even those of her guest, Too Short). Unfortunately — and this is a perfect distillation of Total Dance's failings — it's segued into the "Aspuration Radio Mix" of Paula DeAnda's "Easy," a nothing mix of a nothing song. Also worth checking for is the Lenny B mix, labeled an "exclusive," of Fall Out Boy's "Thnks fr th Mmrs," which firmly plants Pete Wentz and company on the dancefloor they've perhaps always belonged on. The rest of the proceedings are fairly uniformly average, with B- and C-list talent remixing B- and, occasionally, A-listers: PoetNameLife taking on Fergie's "Glamorous," Sunfreakz re-rubbing Ne-Yo's "Because of You," Dave Audé vs. Kelly Clarkson's "Never Again," and more of that ilk. You might enjoy this, but you don't need this.