Expressway Rising

One can almost imagine the pitch some Polygram records A&R exec made to John Moore during the meetings: "Listen, John, first off, we're so happy that you, the former guitarist and drummer from the Jesus and Mary Chain, decided to work with us now that you've left the band. We absolutely love the Jesus & Mary Chain, we think they're one of the most innovative and exciting groups out there right now, and we know that you were a big part of that excitement. So what we'd like you to do is just exactly what you were doing with the Jesus and Mary Chain. Just a couple of little notes, though. First off, all that feedback? The kids don't want to hear that noise. We'll set you up with this producer we know named Joe Barbaria; he used to work with the Cars and 10,000 Maniacs. They're hip with the youngsters just like the Jesus & Mary Chain are, right, Johnny? He's got a very smooth and commercial sound that'll really help us shift some units. And now, about those songs. You know how the Jesus and Mary Chain songs all seem to be about sex and death? Well, that's not really gonna fly on Top 40, Johnny Boy, so if you could make the lyrics be about nothing in particular, and if you could repeat the hook phrases enough times per song to really drill them into the kids' heads, that would just be great, especially if you can manage to drag the songs out to about four and five minutes apiece so you don't have to write as many to have a full album. That's about all we have on this end, John. Any questions? Oh sure, you can wear as much hairspray and mascara as you want in the cover photo, that'll help grab that whole poodle-metal demographic. I like the way you think, Johnny Boy!"